Sunday, 22 November 2015

You Fat Bastard!

Yep things have slipped somewhat over the last couple of weeks with regards to the diet. The munchfest culminated in the consumption of literally dozens of leftover wedding sandwiches this weekend after my eldest son was married. We all had a cracking time and for once I didn't get wrecked as I stayed on the Bavara Wit 0.0% lager all day and to be honest it was a great decision. I didn't particularly miss getting pissed and I definitely didn't miss the hangover!

On the wedding day there were one or two moments of shouting and swearing. The first was when we were halfway to the registry office and I realised that I'd forgotten my false zoobies! I was like 'all that fucking rushing about has made me forget to put my teeth in' much to the amusement of the passengers in my car! We then arrived only to find that you can't fucking park anywhere in Waltham Forest/Walthamstow without a permit! I dropped off the family, after screaming at some prick coming towards me on the wrong side of the road, and then drove around that shitehole shouting and swearing something along the lines of 'what a bunch of cunts, where the fuck are you supposed to fucking park in this shitehole!'

Now I know that I'm still a bit of a fanny magnet, but blimey, once I put that cardigan on the young girls were all over me like a rash ...

The evening entertainment was going well and as a group of us stood outside the club, which was in a secluded woodland spot, I noticed a couple of cars parked up near in the dark near some bushes, one of which had it's lights on. I mentioned that it must be the local doggers, at which point the bride and groom (my son) said 'we'll go and have a word'. Well my son only got halfway as he was so pissed that he walked into the end of an open gate, but the bride walked right up to the car and started talking to the passenger. Before we knew it three cars all turned there lights on, quickly reversed out and all fucked off!

So now it's back to a few good weeeks of training and diet in order to hit the ground running in 2016. I had started to combine some 30-40 minutes of cardio training on the cross trainer just before each of my yoga/pilates sessions so I'll be looking to do this again ... starts tomorrow!

The trading has been pretty mediocre and my attention span frequently dips to a level of non-existant. I have managed to up my stakes slightly so hopefully this will cover the sooper PC when it hits!


+£58.82. It looks as though the winter months could be pretty bleak  in terms of P&L!


 +£161.72. I was going great guns until I dropped £105 backing a 1.01 loser in the 15:30 doh!


+£148.27. I started the day by backing a 1.05 loser for £105! If I ever see that cunt Noel Fehily in real life I'm going to give him the biggest kick in the bollox he has ever had ....

... and then ask him for my fucking £105 back!


+£33.35. Pants ...


£124.46.  I had another poor start to the day but then traded steadily and at least made it into 3 figure territory.


+£43.25. I did a shite load of trading today, 56 races to be precise, and never got any momentum going ...


£127.08. It would have been a much better day today if the jockey hadn't fallen off of Drumlee Sunset at the start of the 13:00! It was still in the lead coming over the last ..

...but unfortunately he had chucked his jockey off about four minutes previously!


+£44.32. I won fuck all today but did get to go out on the piss in the evening and had a great time. The company that I worked for back in the 70's, yep I am an old fucker, holds a Xmas get-together every year and it's always good to meet up with ex-colleagues and chat about all the old times. Over the years we had a great time and I've lost count of the number of times that we went out on the piss, got totally wrecked and had great laughs. Some of the shit that we got up to was unbelievable!


+£140.74. One good trade early doors and then fuck all!


+£117.56. I wasn't going anywhere fast today until I managed to lay a 1.01 loser in the 15:30, which feeels much better than backing a 1.01 loser!


-£74.01. Dropped a few quid today doh!


Today I got to wear a cardigan for the first time in many years (see above) ...


+£34.00. 43 races traded and fuck all won doh!

Sunday, 15 November 2015

Cursed and Living With Bellends!

My trading luck seems to have been cursed recently! A few weeks ago I backed one that unseated the rider at the start and also the one where the weight cloth had fallen off! Then last week I backed the fucker that weighed-in light! I also had a crafty B2L on Drumlee Sunset at the start as he lined up in front and took an early lead only for the fucker to unseat the jockey going around the first bend!

I've also backed one or 2 late in the place market and they've just been pipped for 3rd when the lazy, thick as shite, cheating cunt of a jockey has decided to stop riding the fucker 50 yards from the winning line! How the fuck do they get away with it? I swear if I ever went to the track I'd probably be nicked for GBH!

Now, as if this wasn't enough I also seem to be living with a bunch of cretins! After returning from one of my coastal trips in the Summer I noticed that my new freezer had gone apeshit and the inside resembled the fucking Arctic circle with ice everywhere. Apparently the electric had 'gone off' and now all of the food was covered in thick ice where it had obviously defrosted and had then been frosted again ..... so that all went into the bin!

Fast forward to Saturday and guess what? .... yep someone had left the door of the freezer open and all of the food contained within had defrosted! So another £100 worth of frozen grub hits the bin, but not before I had hurled it all over the kitchen accompanied by torrents of abuse. There were partly defrosted fish fingers, pizzas, frozen veg and sausages everwhere!


+£18.99. A poor day with losing trades all over the place!


-£12.44. Pants ...


+£70.33. Yep, I'm still fucking useless at Wolverhampton!


+£192.62.  A much needed nice steady day of trading ...

+£106.00.  Another steady and yet unremarkable day ...


-£179.55.  I started the day with a mixed bag of results and them chased a price and overstaked in the 15:30 and paid the price! The remainder of the day was pretty dismal but at least I kept the loss to under £200!


+£160.64. I had 43 trades today and only 3 small losses, which is always good, especially following a wank day like yesterday!


 +£121.78. A bit up and down today ... but luckily mostly up!